The end's not near, it's here

[whattingawhat]

Wait!
Just one more time
To look into your eyes sublime
Just one more time

Hush!
Just one more kiss
To end a romance full of bliss
Just one more kiss

Hush!
Just one more night
To love you and hold you tight
Just one more night

Wait!
Just one more word
To tell you, you were my world
Please just one more word.

Comments

[the_dawnster]

"Oh yeah. Bad things happen and we wouldn't be people if we didn't react to them. Some of us write names and draw lines through them in journals. Some of us go evil and try to destroy the world." Dawn says. "Either way, you can always come back. Redeem yourself. Do the right thing. Put on the white hat. Be the change."

But she does get that Peter might be revealing more about himself than he means to. She looks sideways to him. "Have you done the journal thing?" It's a round about way of asking if he's gone evil and tried to destroy the world.

[oneguyinaunitard]

It's good, the redemption thing. It's what he tries to remember when he disables his victims. It's what he likes to think about Dr. Connors. At the same time, he's not sure there is such a thing as redemption for some people. How do you redeem yourself once you've killed people? How do you ever make up for taking a life, for removing a person from the world? It's the sort of thing he spends more time pondering than he'll probably ever admit.

His eyebrows raise at her question, taking a moment to figure out what she's saying. "Do I--I--uhm...no. I'm not--not much of a jour-journal sort of person." He shakes his head. "I just--just--nah. I haven't--don't journal. Not that I think--that I mean, I know some people do. Have, but--" he shakes his head again.

[the_dawnster]

"I've always done --..." She pauses and shakes her head. "I mean the monks who made me created all these journals and once I was made I just kept on writing in them like a doofus. Then I burned them all when I found out ninety-nine point nine of them were fake. Then I picked it up again to have real journals with real experiences and knowledge in them."

She glanced at Peter. "If I asked you to would you write something for me? You know, since I can't pick up the pen."

[oneguyinaunitard]

"So you've kept a journal for as long as you can remember," Peter tells her with a crooked smile. He knows enough about the monks and the fake memories and how Dawn feels about it. He wants her to feel as normal as possible.

"Of course. Yeah," he nods. "I'll find you some paper and a pen." He gets up to do just that.

[the_dawnster]

"There's lots of notebooks and journals in the book bags under my bed. And pens." She calls after him. "Sorry. They're glitter pens."

[oneguyinaunitard]

"I think I can handle a little glitter," he assures her as he gets up and goes down the hall, opening doors until he finds one that he's convinced is Dawn's. He comes back with a notebook with pink lined paper in it and a purple glitter pen. He sits down on the couch next to her, certain that he's not going to like what she asks him to write, but knowing that he'll write it anyway.

"Consider me your transcriptionist."

[the_dawnster]

"Okay..." She pauses, waiting a bit to collect her thoughts before she starts speaking. "Dear Buffy, So here we are at the end of all things... not really. I just tried to go all Tolkien on you. Google it. Anyway, mostly at the end of my stuff, not yours. The way I see it, you'll live forever and be all invincible and super cool and generally amazing at everything into your fifties. Then you'll retire and live your life out on a beach somewhere and perv on much younger men cause that's what old ladies do when they retire, right?

"So I just wanted to say... I love you. I'm sorry you got saddled with all of this, with me. I know I kind of grew on you like mold does on cheesy goodness. But I like to think I'm the healthy kind of mold that's good for you. I know you didn't have to come around to being forced to have a sister. I know you didn't have to care. I know I got incredibly lucky that you were the Slayer when all that went down, when I was created. Another person probably wouldn't have... I just know I got lucky.

"I also know I was incredibly annoying sometimes. But what can you expect of a person who's only one or two years old. I grew out of it, mostly. But I'm sorry I was annoying. I'm sorry I stepped in gum when I borrowed those boots you really like. And I'm sorry I spilled ketchup on that pink off the shoulder silk top you like too. Oh. And I confess that I was the one who stole your silver dangle earrings back in the day and then lost them. It was me. Surprise!

"And here's what I don't always say to your face cause who in their right mind would boost the ego of someone so generally good at everything? You're amazing. You're the best superhero. You're the best sister. You're the best stand-in mom. You're the best caretaker. You're the best nurturer. You're the best everything to me. And I love you a lot even if you won't remember me in however long it takes for me to fully disappear. You chose to keep me in your life and keep me safe. You went to bat for me time and again when you really didn't have to. You love me even though you don't have to. And I love you too. You're my sister."

She's crying now and she wipes at her eyes, he shoulders shaking with each breath. "But you have to do something about the conditioner you use cause you hair... it has a thing." She sniffles. "Your bratty sister, Dawn."

[oneguyinaunitard]

Peter writes quickly, but legibly. He's had a lot of practice taking notes and it pays off here. By the time he finishes, he's fighting tears as well, jaw tightening up. He puts the notebook and pen on the table, looking over at Dawn.

"Come here," he says, beckoning her closer. "We're going to pretend I can hold you while you cry so that I'm not entirely useless. I mean, beyond my fascinating ability to be a scribe."

[the_dawnster]

Dawn inches closer to him, seemingly pressed against, and some parts of her overlapping him since she can't help it. She rests her head on his shoulder... kind of. "She probably won't get the Tolkien reference. She doesn't read all that much." And for some reason, that fact just makes her cry harder.

[oneguyinaunitard]

He really, really wishes there were more he could do, but he'd tried working on this from the science front and unfortunately, he knew zip about magic. He could probably fight the zompires with Buffy and Faith, but right now, everyone is more interested in him staying with Dawn. It makes sense. He's the one person with memories that are entirely real, so while Faith, Buffy and even Angel are forgetting Dawn, Peter can't forget her.

"Maybe after this you can convince her to listen to them on audio."