whattingawhat: (jealousy)
Buffy Summers ([personal profile] whattingawhat) wrote2008-06-05 11:34 pm

Dontcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? [Dontcha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?]

And God I hate that song but hey! whatever

[Jealousy]

So the green eyed vampire is like my BFF whether I want him to be or not. It’s not like I don’t try to do the whole stakey-stakey thing but it never really works. I can’t help it. I see a woman making eyes at Danny and I start losing my control. It’s this white hot rage that makes me feel like I’m going to have to choke a bitch. Yeah, I did just say those words. No I don’t need medication. I’m perfectly capable of avoiding strangulation. Besides, my boyfriend is a CSI. That leaves like marks and fingerprints and evidence and the last thing I want to do is go to jail because I got jealous and…choked a bitch. Really not the legacy I want to leave behind and I think you have to be married to have conjugal visits. Besides, prison orange is not a good color on me.

Sooooooo jealousy, yeah I’m a victim and when it strikes me, it’s like a bulldozer hitting me right on the chin. You know that spot where a lot of boxers go all glass jaw? Yeah well I don’t have a glass jaw but it’s the same concept. Jealousy hits me and I’m going down. Except with a boxer it’s like one spot. Only I know it’s not. Technically it’s the neck twisting until the body sends overloading warning signs and passes out. Right…anyway the point is I’m jealous. Jealous rage jealous and I know I don’t have any reason to be. Danny is loyal and faithful and trustworthy and everything but jealousy is not a logical little, green eyed vampire. Jealous is like insanity and it just runs amuck. I’m not even sure what the word amuck means but Mom used to use it when Dawnie and I were running wild all over the house. So I’m all amucky with the jealousy and that whole violent girl side of me is threatening to amuck, strangle a girl and land me in prison for like ever.

I know that jealousy is a flaw and I know it probably says a lot about me mentally, emotionally and whatever. It probably means I’ve got daddy issues, abandonment issues, commitment issues, self-worth issues, insecurity issues and self-esteem issues. Whatever, I’m like Vogue, except I kick ass. One jealous Buffy, reporting for therapy.

[identity profile] deep-red-bells.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 04:52 am (UTC)(link)
Oh honey, the ways you are not alone, let me count them. I do that jealous possessivey thing...just, way too much.

[identity profile] whattingawhat.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 04:57 am (UTC)(link)
Oh. My. God. Do you just want to stick a sign on Boy that says DO Not Hit On This Boy. His Girlfriend will kick your ever loving ass into next week and that is not as fun as it might sound. Kthanxbyebyenao.

He went to a HIGH SCHOOL to interview people about a murder and TEENAGE girls hit on him. I wanted to choke a bunch of little bitches.

[identity profile] deep-red-bells.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 04:59 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, honey, I almost did not even want him to come see me. All I could think was "I'm bringing into a household full of teenage girls, raging hormones and all and he already thinks the aggressive Slayer thing is hot, am I STUPID?!" SO much with the want to just stick a sign on him that says "TAKEN, MINE, NOT YOURS."

[identity profile] whattingawhat.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 05:06 am (UTC)(link)
Oh god, I'm thinking about taking him to Scotland sometime. Personally? I think it will be funny as all hell. 236 teenage girls all in one place and I already know from the pictures I showed them that at least half of them would be with the hitting. They also know I'd be with the hitting too. I do kinda want to tattoo his forehead though. Property of Buffy Summers. Touch and Die. Signs are too easily removed. You need lasers for tattoos.

[identity profile] deep-red-bells.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
That is very true. However I don't think they'd be wild about the idea of having said tattoo on their foreheads...there may be limits to just how much our pouts can get us.

[identity profile] whattingawhat.livejournal.com 2008-06-06 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah...I need to investigate (http://community.livejournal.com/just_sayit/19293.html) this whole idea.