Buffy Summers (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
whattingawhat) wrote2008-05-26 04:03 pm
whattingawhat) wrote2008-05-26 04:03 pm
Entry tags:
I've got my hands at redemption's side [Whose scars are bigger than these doubts of mine]
{Wrath}
So, Danny and I were talking earlier. One of the things we have in common is wrath. We’re pretty much agreed that it’s the sin we commit the most. It’s also the one that’s that hardest to admit. I mean I have no problems saying that sometimes (ok probably second to wrath) I envy Carrie Bradshaw’s closet. And lust would be at the top of the list except that I don’t think it counts as lust when you love the person you’re all lusty about. Gluttony, I have my moments particularly if chocolate or milk are involved. I love my milk. I’m not really greedy or lazy (except on Sundays and then I just want to lie in bed for hours but God did say it’s a day of rest so I’m resting!). Sometimes I am pretty prideful and when I am I usually get knocked down a peg or two. I’ve learned enough to take my prideful moments in private and to make sure they don’t go to my head.
Wrath though…that’s the big one. That’s the one that I fall to almost every day. And the reason it’s the hardest to admit is because I want to be a ‘good’ person and ‘good’ people don’t lose their tempers. They don’t enjoy beating the crap out of something or someone. They don’t like the adrenaline rush that comes with it. [LFD] And good slayers don’t enjoy the job so much that it itches when they don’t indulge. They don’t run through the street yelling I’m the best, I’m the fastest and they don’t jump between buildings just because they can. They don’t pray for monsters and they don’t taunt the ones they get. Good slayers go out, get the job done and go home to eat some non fat yogurt and watch the late late show. [ULFD] If I admit that I enjoy all that then slipping across that line I’ve drawn is that much easier. I’ve seen what I become if I slip too far and I don’t want to be that person. Not ever.
I pray which probably surprises people and no I don’t really know who or what I’m praying to but I know there’s someone(s) up there listening. I try to walk that line and stay on the straight and narrow. It’s harder when my friends and family are hurt. I’ve slipped and I’ve clawed my way back. I’m stronger than I look but if I’ve ever had an adversary that came close to doing me in, it was Wrath.
So, Danny and I were talking earlier. One of the things we have in common is wrath. We’re pretty much agreed that it’s the sin we commit the most. It’s also the one that’s that hardest to admit. I mean I have no problems saying that sometimes (ok probably second to wrath) I envy Carrie Bradshaw’s closet. And lust would be at the top of the list except that I don’t think it counts as lust when you love the person you’re all lusty about. Gluttony, I have my moments particularly if chocolate or milk are involved. I love my milk. I’m not really greedy or lazy (except on Sundays and then I just want to lie in bed for hours but God did say it’s a day of rest so I’m resting!). Sometimes I am pretty prideful and when I am I usually get knocked down a peg or two. I’ve learned enough to take my prideful moments in private and to make sure they don’t go to my head.
Wrath though…that’s the big one. That’s the one that I fall to almost every day. And the reason it’s the hardest to admit is because I want to be a ‘good’ person and ‘good’ people don’t lose their tempers. They don’t enjoy beating the crap out of something or someone. They don’t like the adrenaline rush that comes with it. [LFD] And good slayers don’t enjoy the job so much that it itches when they don’t indulge. They don’t run through the street yelling I’m the best, I’m the fastest and they don’t jump between buildings just because they can. They don’t pray for monsters and they don’t taunt the ones they get. Good slayers go out, get the job done and go home to eat some non fat yogurt and watch the late late show. [ULFD] If I admit that I enjoy all that then slipping across that line I’ve drawn is that much easier. I’ve seen what I become if I slip too far and I don’t want to be that person. Not ever.
I pray which probably surprises people and no I don’t really know who or what I’m praying to but I know there’s someone(s) up there listening. I try to walk that line and stay on the straight and narrow. It’s harder when my friends and family are hurt. I’ve slipped and I’ve clawed my way back. I’m stronger than I look but if I’ve ever had an adversary that came close to doing me in, it was Wrath.