whattingawhat | 16th Slay [Text] Until you've lived a thousand times

Current Mood: working

Entry tags:

16th Slay [Text] Until you've lived a thousand times

Slaying for Dummies

1. Wear a cross 2. Carry a bottle of holy water 3. Do not, I repeat do not carry a stake. Shoving a sharp piece of wood through someone's rib cage and piercing the heart is a lot harder than it looks. 4. Don't go out in dark alleys or graveyards alone. 5. If their fashion sense is a decade or more behind chances are, it's a vampire. Don't go home with them. 6. Put me on speed dial. 7. No really, put me on speed dial. 8. When in doubt, call me. Edited Afterwards to include: 9. See this vampire? He's Spike. Don't stake him.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You're like Kim Possible.

Minus the pink hair.

[Since this is probably useful information, Eliot might have actually taken notes.]

Thanks, Rocky.

I'll show you in person sometime. We'll run through the whole thing.

Piece of wood in the heart? I have pretty good aim. A little strength. I figure if Xander can do it, I can. Can Xander stake a vamp?

Xander...mostly gets knocked out but he has staked a vamp before...I think.

Well if he can do it, I can do it.

Against most vampires, one on one, you'll probably be fine. I'll take you patrolling some night.

Sounds good. Would be a blow to my ego if you didn't think I'd cut it.

No, you're good in a fight. Fighting a vamp isn't that different from fighting a human except they don't usually carry weapons and they're stronger, faster, more durable than a human. They feel pain but it doesn't stop them.

Next time we spar I'll do more of the going all out and you can try to break me.

I've fought with you. You're hard to break.

Because vampires think it's their duty to break me.

Anyway, depending on the vampire they're stronger, faster and more unbreakable than I am. So...practice is good.

[A pause here]

And I briefly went insane and entertained the idea of having you and Spike spar. Sanity is back.

[Pause]

Mostly. Unless there will be shirtlessness, oil and me with popcorn.

No. Sanity defintely back. You have to settle with sparring me. There could still be shirtlessness and oil.

Edited 2010-11-08 20:14 (UTC)

That wouldn't go well, the me and Spike thing. Glad you're sane, Rocky.

I sorta didn't think it would. I'd rather both of you survive.

I'll give you a blunted stake and you can try to stake me.

You like this kind of thing, huh?

Sparring? Teaching? Slaying?

Yes to the first 2 and most of the time yes to the last one. Sometimes I don't like what it does to me and my life but it's part of me and part of that is liking it.

So I wouldn't be able to stake a vampire if I was attacked?

Not necessarily? You probably have the strength for it. I can show you how sometime. It takes practice. I missed the heart my first time out.

Do regular people stake vamps?

They can. It just takes more effort for them than me and their chances of getting hurt sky rocket. I was born for this.

Maybe you should show me how sometime. Unless it's just aim for the heart and put a lot of strength behind it.

It mostly is except vampires hit like a truck and they sort of do everything possible to make sure you don't hit the heart.

Hm. Guess I won't know until I encounter a vampire.

Not the best way to find out. I could spar with you or try to talk Spike into being a training dummy.

...I probably won't call him a training dummy when I'm asking.

I don't know. Right now isn't a good time.

Oh I'm not being all pushy and it has to be now. I'm just saying don't go looking for one to stake in the underground. They're mean and nasty down there. It's a bad time to figure out what you are and aren't capable of.

I survived torture in Hell for three days before I almost died... I guess I feel like I can handle myself well enough.

Torture is...more an emotional and mental thing. Killing a vampire? Totally physical. Not that you couldn't. I'm just totally discouraging the idea of you doing it on your own the first time.

Advice taken. Thanks.

What if they just have very bad taste in clothes?

Bad taste is totally different from a decade or six too late.

But people here are from centuries apart. I don't think that'll help very much.

Okay. Well. You could have a point.

There have to be other ways to tell them apart, right?

Thanks, luv. I was hoping there'd be a tutorial on this.

I added to it. Happy now?

...Deliriously.

You do realize back home, the girls have the same instructions. You're in the unofficial slayer handbook.

I'm touched. I'd be more touched if you told me Angel wasn't in it.

I'll let you pretend.

Not quite the same is it?

No but any vampire with a soul deserves not to be staked by slayers.

Oh, now we're a whole category, are we?

That's what happens when you go from one to two.

I still like to think of myself as a unique snowflake, thanks.

I'll write that on your forehead.

I'll take a pass on that if you don't mind, luv.

What. And that works does it?

If it doesn't, I'll find something else. Either way the 'something else' doesn't belong in a Dummies list.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

16th Slay [Text] Until you've lived a thousand times

Voice

Re: Voice

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

Re: [Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

[Voice]

Re: [Voice]

Re: [Voice]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject