Damsel in Distress, My Ass

So in SIU, Jondy's bar has been closed for a week. Buffy and Sam were instructed to amuse each other since they normally spend a lot of time in Jondy's bar. This is a general idea of what that looks like.

Buffy: No offense but I hope Jondy's bar opens soon.

Sam: *raises eyebrow*

Buffy: For one you're monosyllabic. And if I can get you to string more than like five sentences together you whine. A lot.

Sam: I do not whine!

Buffy: Oh please. I've heard babies that whine less than you. I've killed vampires that whined less than you. I know a Hell Goddess that whined less than you. And if you'd ever met Glory you'd realize that's saying that you whine a lot

Sam: *gives her his bitch face*

Buffy: And that's another thing. You have this whole bitch face thing going on. My baby sister doesn't have a bitch face that good.

Sam: I do not have a bitch face!

Buffy: *rolls her eyes* Whatever. You know how I know you're not the anti-Christ? You whine too much.

Sam: *bitch face*

Buffy: You know how I know you're not the anti-Christ? I could kick your ass in a new pair of Jimmy Choos just after having had a manicure and not break a nail.

Sam: *bitch face*

Buffy: You know how I know you're not the anti-Christ? You have a bitch face.

Sam: Dean!!!!

Buffy: You know how I know you're not the anti-Christ? You call for your brother.

Sam: I hate you.

Buffy: Get in line. Oh hey! That might be one sign that you are the anti-Christ. You hate me.



And I'm making her stop there because she will irritate the shit out of him until he shoots her. With The Colt. Ten times. Just to make sure she's dead.